TonytheRainbowHealer

I am a holistic intuitive energy healer, Reiki Master Teacher, and a gay male who is fed up with the current narrative on transgender affirmation.  Due to my role in helping others heal, Spirit has guided me to speak out on the current five alarm fire that is gender ideology which is overtaking society.  It has not been an easy or quick path to come to this place. I have read and studied this issue extensively and worked for five years at an HIV/AIDS nonprofit, five years at an LGBTQ primary care clinic, and a year and a half for an equity office at a major University. For years I found myself agreeing to and promoting the gender affirmation and trans activist side of this issue, to now reversing course towards the gender critical path.  I have started to see the direct harm coming to myself, women, children, LGB and even T people in my life and in society due to the spread of this social contagion.  I have read many pieces on the physical, mental, and emotional aspects of this issue, but have not seen as much on the spiritual ones so I want to take some time to focus some effort on this.  Not everything that follows is strictly from Spirit or my experiences as a healer as some of it is also inspired by my experiences as a gay man living on planet Earth.  I also want to preface that nothing that follows is meant as a condemnation of people who identify as transgender or nonbinary. All humans and all souls are deserving of love, compassion, empathy, healing, and basic rights from employment to healthcare to food, water, clothing, shelter, and clean air.  Everyone should be free to love who they want (obviously based on what is moral and consensual) and love themselves as they are.  I do have a moral and ethical obligation as a healer to bring truth (which = light) to the planet and as a holistic healer, this needs to be on all levels (spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical).  To be transparent about my spiritual beliefs, I do not subscribe to any religion but rather try to find the universal truths in all religious and spiritual paths.  I use the words God, Goddess, Universe, Source, Love, Light, Nature, Energy, Presence, Soul, Spirit, and Nature interchangeably as to me they are all the same thing or aspects of the same thing.  I also am aware that what I am about to write will not be able to be heard by people who do not believe in the spiritual or who might have trauma surrounding religion and spirituality, but I have freewill to speak my truth, just as all the worshipers of gender woo woo have the right to have their beliefs.

Masculine and Feminine Energies

From an energetic perspective as it pertains to energy work, there are two types of energies we all have inside of us. Yes, we ALL have both masculine and feminine energies inside of us. Some people have more masculine energies, and some people have more feminine energies, but we still all hold both. Our left side of our bodies and our right brains contain feminine energies, and our right sides of our bodies and left sides of our brains contain masculine energies. Energetically the masculine is the part of us that is more physical, logical, rational, analytical, and giving (left brain which governs our right side of the body) with our feminine energies being our more non-physical, emotional, sensitive, nurturing, creative and receiving selves (right brain which governs our left side of the body). Energetically, this is still a binary and there really is not a third “nonbinary” energy that we produce in our energy system, and to ignore or reject the fact that one has both energies in their human energy system will cause one’s energy to be off balanced and open the human body up to disease.

Some Spiritual Perspectives

Much of the spiritual information I have learned came through my spiritual awakening from reading and studying near death experiences. People who have died and come back to Earth after visiting the realms on “the other side” have been told repeatedly by guides and angels that we (in combination with assistance from our spirit guides and the spiritual realm) choose our life circumstances into which we are born for our own spiritual learning and growth. We choose our parents, our bodies, the environments we come into, and we develop a general blueprint of what lessons we want to learn in our lifetimes. We do this in partnership with Mother Earth and by coming to the physical realm, our souls make contractual obligations with what it means to come to Earth and the physical realm. We might agree to be born with an abundance of female or male energies, and those energies might not match the gender stereotype of the sex of the body we agree to be born in. This will have us appear as gender non-conforming on the earth plane, but this in no way means that we were born into the wrong body.  As a part of the physical construct of the Earth realm, there are only two sexes – male and female. This is not changeable. The idea that we can be born into wrong bodies is a spiritual myth. To reject our choice of body is to say your soul made a mistake, mother nature made a mistake, and ultimately the Universe made a mistake. These things do not make mistakes, so it is impossible to be “born in the wrong body.” Our human bodies are our temples, the physical vessels that hold our spiritual selves. To reject the body is to reject your temple as created by you yourself, nature, and Source.

Another aspect that plays heavily into both gender confusion and sexuality confusion has to do with carryover from past lives. Unfortunately, in the Western world where we are governed by the Abrahamic religions of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, much of modern society has lost this important aspect of the nature of our spiritual selves and thus this is not considered. A large percentage of people who are homosexual, bisexual, or gender nonconforming are this way due to a spillover from recent past lives. More specifically, the most recent past life or several past lives were often lives lived as the opposite sex or as a non-heterosexual orientation. This does not mean we were “born in the wrong body,” but rather it is simply a matter of us adjusting to our new lives in the construct and conditions we came down into in the present life. There is no problem spiritually with us coming down to earth as gender non-conforming. I would argue that it is MORE important for us to learn to love and accept ourselves as we are (gender non-conforming and sexed human bodies) and not try to change ourselves physically. This provides souls with a tremendous opportunity to practice self-love AS WE ARE rather than trying to be something we cannot physically be. It also has the potential for initiating immense societal change by smashing gender stereotypes and gender constructed roles that have been developed on Earth for millennia by challenging the status quo to show that men and women do not have to conform to a gender stereotype. This is the ultimate way we can “smash the patriarchy,” fight homophobia and misogyny and bring balance to Earth.

Gender: A Mental, Emotional, and Social Construct

I remember criticizing JK Rowling with everyone else I knew without having even read anything she wrote on the issue. When I started to awaken to my concerns about gender stuff myself, I went back and read what she originally wrote on this and found it thoughtful, polite, caring, and not overly controversial. I remember thinking “this is what everyone is in an uproar over?” She just seemed like she was speaking her truth from the heart as well as many actual truths about biology and sex that cannot be ignored. When I started looking into this more, I remember the moment the wheels fell off the gender ideology train, and I felt like a spell had been released. It was a very physical visceral reaction, and it was surreal to go through. That moment was when I realized that A. gender and sex are different and most of society keeps trying to conflate them and that B. one of the biggest causes of division over this issue is that a good chunk of the population wants to pretend sex does not exist while gender is all that matters.

While some things do come easier or more naturally to one sex vs. the other sex, gender is largely a mental, emotional, and social construct created by humans on earth. It is almost exclusively made up of stereotypes of what “a woman should be” and “what a man should be.” On Earth, men are to be self-sufficient, tough, rational, aggressive, hypersexual, physical, strong, and the breadwinners of a household, while women are to be polite, accommodating, meek, receptive, emotional, virginal, nurturing, homemakers. Men are to wear pants and suits and women are to wear makeup, high heels, dresses, and skirts. Boys are interested in things like sports, trucks, guns, video games, and the military while girls are interested in dolls, the arts, romance, clothes, hair, and makeup. Gender non-conforming people are people who do not fit the stereotypes imposed on them by their minds, emotions, and societal rules, rules as to what should be normal for them based on their sex according to what society or the mind dictates. The more I thought about this, the more absurd it seemed to me. I do not live my life subscribing to conform myself to a plethora of stereotypes. For what it is worth, I am fairly gender non-conforming in many ways. I much prefer the stereotypical female activities, am extremely emotional, sensitive, and intuitive, and have spent most of my life befriending and hanging out with women. I now wholeheartedly reject the gender construct and do not want to organize or label my life around it. Any person of any sex can do whatever gender stereotypes make them happy. People should just be themselves and not worry about how others perceive them. Furthermore, it is these regressive stereotypes being pushed on people that take us backwards and that move us away from equality for both the sexes. Gender ideology reifies gender stereotypes as something to identify with which pushes us away from trying to create a society where both sexes have equal opportunities. It maintains the status quo for what male and female roles in society are “supposed to be” which is a breeding ground for more misogyny and inequality.

I always hear from trans rights activists that gender is a spectrum and that anyone can fall anywhere on that spectrum.  This idea that everyone has a special amount of their own magical gender makeup immediately renders defining one’s gender meaningless.  This would mean that every single person on planet earth has a different unique gender makeup which apparently also needs to be labeled.  If we are just going to give everyone their own special gender label, what is the point? 

Sex: A Biological Reality in the Physical Realm

Sex on the other hand is a biological reality in the physical realm. Our human bodies are divided into one of two sexes, male or female. Apparently, we are to the point of having to explain Biology 101 now so I will.  Males produce smaller gametes (sperm), and females produce larger gametes (ova/eggs) for the purposes of reproduction.  Male bodies generally have male organs such as a penis, prostate, testicles, and scrotum and produce higher levels of testosterone while females generally have body parts like ovaries, vaginas, and uteruses and produce larger amounts of hormones such as estrogen and progesterone. In mammals, males have XY chromosomes and females have XX chromosomes. It does not matter what you wear or what gender stereotypes you conform to, your sex is immutable and unchangeable. Even in intersex people who have physical disorders that cause some of these sex characteristics to be confused (this is different than gender dysphoria which is a mental health condition rather than a physical health condition), one can still tell what sex an intersex person is from medical testing. Ultimately, these categories need to be maintained because they describe human sex and reproduction in the physical realm as that is the primary purpose of these descriptions. We use words for communication and words have meaning.  It does not matter what one “thinks” or “feels” about their gender; their sex is unchangeable. Thoughts and feelings are not facts. 

Sex is an earth plane truth that cannot be ignored or rejected and to do so will cause disease in the energy system. We have an entire chakra dedicated to keeping us grounded on the physical plane (the root chakra). To ignore our physical reality makes us ungrounded, disembodied, and disassociated physically and energetically. It is my job as a healer to heal holistically (physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually), and I refuse to sacrifice the physical body’s health in a client for the sake of mental and emotional health. I do not believe it is kind or healing to bury one’s head in the sand and lie to people to appease people’s mental and emotional beliefs. Lying to someone is harmful and abusive. Transgender women are men and transgender men are women, full stop.

We cannot change any of our other physical traits that we are born with so why should we cave in and redefine sex? Several years ago, a woman named Rachel Dolezal was absolutely trashed by society and the media for having “identified” as a Black woman even though she is White. This issue is no different. It does not matter if you put colored contacts on, your eyes are still the same color. I would love to be able to fly or breathe underwater, but the fact is I cannot. It is impossible because I am not a bird or a fish. Stating biological facts is not “transphobic.”  It is the construct we agreed to before we came to Earth. Finally, while gender is mostly a pile of stereotypes, there are very real differences between the sexes (for one, men are generally physically stronger) and this impacts everything we are seeing so many arguments about right now from bathroom and locker room spaces to prisons to women’s sports. These are valid concerns because sex is a biological physical reality.

Sexual Orientation: Sex not Gender

I reject gender as a construct for organizing my life around and thus I do not include it in the definition of sexual orientation (which of course literally contains the word sex within it). However, we are now seeing a movement to change the definition of sexual orientation to mean being attracted to the gender stereotype of male or female instead of the sex of male or female. All the major LGBTQ nonprofits such as HRC and the Trevor Project have moved to this definition which allows trans men (female sexed people) to identify as gay men and trans women (male sexed people) to identify as lesbians. This has completely destroyed the meaning of sexual orientation which renders it useless. I will use myself as an example. I am a gay male. I am attracted to gay men (male sexed people) only. To be blunt, I do not want date, marry, or have sex with vaginas. I am attracted to and turned on by male bodies and functioning natural penises only. This new definition of “gay man” has now left me sorting through and rejecting trans men left and right on dating apps because I do not want this, and I am not even allowed to tell people one word of why they are being rejected or I will get banned from the apps.

I have been called transphobic because I do not want trans men in my dating and sex life.  It took me decades to come to terms with my own sexuality, accept myself, and heal the shame around these issues and now society is trying to reverse my own healing process and erase my sexual orientation?  I have heard some say, “you just haven’t found the right trans man yet.” This just sounds like the same argument gay men hear from right wing religious bible thumpers (“you haven’t found the right woman yet”) except now it is coming from the political left wing.  I have lesbian friends who cannot find any other lesbians to date because this ideology has become so pervasive.  I would argue that any gay man who can have sex with a female sexed person and any lesbian who can have sex with a male sexed person is not gay or lesbian.  They are bisexual which is totally fine, and there is nothing wrong with it.  Bisexuality is beautiful!  For some reason these people cannot admit that they like the opposite sex at least a little bit which screams biphobia to me.  We are now at a point where it is considered “transphobic” to even use the word bisexual because “pansexual” is more “inclusive.”  Bisexual invisibility has often been an issue in modern times and now here we go with bisexuality being erased once again.   

Nonbinary

When referring to sex, there is no “nonbinary.” There is only male and female. There are no other sexes as all humans are one or the other.  If someone wants to argue intersexed people fall into both because they have characteristics from both sexes, I would still say there are only two sexes and not some mythical brand-new non-female or non-male genitals or gametes that we have discovered. Being an individual who is neither sex is not a possibility on planet Earth.

From an energetic and spiritual perspective, as mentioned above, all humans contain both male and female energies. As souls who live many lives, we have all lived lives as both male and female (unless you are a brand-new soul in your first several lives on Earth maybe). Our souls are all sparks of God which contains all the female and all the male energies. It would be more accurate to say we are both ends of the binary than to say we are neither of them. The only way nonbinary works is if you only subscribe to gender, and you decide you do not like to be considered either the male or female gender stereotypes.  Also, we need to stop demonizing binaries.  The natural world and the Universe are chock-full of binaries.  Binaries are beautiful too!

Queer

There has been a movement in recent years to use the word queer as an umbrella term for all LGBTQ+ people. I reject this term for multiple reasons. First, the word has a history of being a slur which has been used to denigrate, bully, and cause violence to LGBT people for quite a long time. There are many (particularly older LGBT people) who find this word offensive. I have trauma and experiences around being violently bullied and having hate crimes committed against me using this word where it was said hand in hand with the word faggot and the like so the constant use of this word triggers PTSD in me and feels like a microaggression. We would not call everyone in the Black community the N word, so we need to realize that not everyone in the LGBT community likes the Q word or wants to be identified with it. Second, the word used to literally translate to “strange” or “odd,” and I never want to associate my sexual orientation with those words as homosexuality is a completely normal and natural state on Earth.

Finally, queer has become an all-encompassing word which allows anyone with any nontraditional definition of gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transexual to be able to assimilate and become a part of the “queer” community. We now have label after label and flag after flag to allow everyone into the community (including straight people, gender conforming people, and every sexual fetish imaginable). The LGBTQ movement is starting to feel like an ego-based movement where we affirm and include every sexual desire and mental gender construct.  Ultimately, it appears it will not stop until every single person on the planet gets their own letter and flag. You are attracted to people’s minds and intellect? You get a flag! You are attracted to someone emotionally? You get a flag! You are drawn to a good sense of humor? Here’s your flag and label too! Do you like long walks on the beach?  Boom flag!  Also, this obsession with labels and flags is becoming very cultlike.  I see no difference between adorning your house, car, business, and clothing with pride flags or with Trump and MAGA flags.  I believe we have reached the proverbial Ouroboros where the extreme right and extreme left have met – the snake eating its own tail so to speak.  Ultimately, I would like to see humanity move beyond symbols and labels for identity. Also, as a political movement, the more you include everyone, the more it waters down the power of a political movement. It is a bit like saying “All Lives Matter.”  Simply put, if everyone is included, it no longer means anything so why bother?  Sex and sexual orientation are supposed to be exclusive as that is the point of labeling it.

Gender Affirmation and Medicalization of Children

I am seriously concerned about the pushing of gender ideology and medical transitioning onto children. While as a healer I would probably not recommend most anyone to medically transition, I really take issue with what is being done with children. Many whistleblowers have come forward who have worked in the gender industry (not to mention the many experiences of people who have detransitioned) to condemn many of the practices of gender affirmation in children. Kids are being taught gender ideology at younger and younger ages before they even begin to know who they are. I do not believe young children can say they are another sex. If children begin to tell their parents they are a different sex, this can be due to them remembering their past lives when they were an opposite sex. There have been so many documented cases of children remembering their careers, families, friends, cultures, and even how they died in their previous lives. Many times, this bleeds over when we are born, and it can take some time for them to work it out. It does great damage to a child’s psyche to just roll over and tell a child they are right and transition them to another gender stereotype rather than tell them the physical reality that in this life they are the sex they are and that that is ok, but still unchangeable. Also, children have wild imaginations. Are we really going to go down the path of letting our little children tell us what reality is on Earth and the physical realm?  What happened to parents teaching children about the realities of life in the physical realm?

Gender identity beliefs usually develop way before sexual orientation in children.  So many gender non-conforming kids are just lesbian, gay, or bisexual people who will not discover this until they go through puberty (a process which generally resolves gender dysphoria in most people) as that is when most people figure out their sexual orientation. I have serious concerns we are transing away the gay in many, many children before they can even discover their sexual orientations.

I take issue with the state and schools deciding that parents have no say in their children’s growth and development. The idea that parents should not be informed about a child’s gender dysphoria or that they have considered changing their pronouns or name at school is deeply disturbing. The most important relationship in a child’s life should be the parent/child one and not the state/child one. Not to say that parents are all good because God knows many are terrible but withholding critical info about their child’s mental/emotional health from them is not ok.

The fact that there are so many detransitioners is disconcerting.  I would argue that if there is even one person who regrets making the decision to transition then there needs to be extremely strict safeguarding to make sure people are making appropriate decisions about what to do with their human bodies to manage their gender dysphoria.  We should be treating mental health problems with mental health care whenever possible, rather than using human created drugs and surgeries to solve mental health problems.  It is unacceptable to allow people to mutilate their completely healthy bodies with unnatural surgeries and drugs when there is a chance people are going to regret their decisions. If people want to talk about suicide risks, here is a prime candidate for a higher suicide risk.

Lastly, I do not agree with giving kids experimental medical treatments which will harm the body permanently in the name of mental/emotional health. First, many children who are put on these drugs have serious trauma and mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety, autism, sexual assault, PTSD, bipolar disorder, eating disorders, body dysmorphia, or suicidal ideations. Our mental health industry assumes all these mental health problems are only the result of the fact they have gender dysphoria, and because we have created a society of affirm first ask questions later, therapists are not allowed to explore these issues thoroughly to see if perhaps these issues are causing the gender dysphoria and not the other way around. Kids are then put on puberty blockers (like birth and death, puberty is a natural process that all humans should go through) which cause all sorts of medical problems (decreased bone density for instance) and then hormones (which again cause loads of side effects such as blood clots and strokes) and then many move on to gender confirming surgeries which involve any number of painful and debilitating procedures, which are often unsuccessful, dangerous, and will remove the ability to reproduce, breast feed, or ever have a sexual orgasm. If an adult wants to go down this path of their own free will fine, but if children are not allowed to drink alcohol and smoke, why would we let them do this of all things? We do not treat other body dysmorphic mental health problems this way, such as telling anorexics that they absolutely should go on diets and get liposuction. 

The most common argument I hear for allowing this ideology in children is that “if I don’t do this and agree to their demands, thoughts, and feelings, they will commit suicide” (or parents are told they must do this by therapists and doctors because if they do not their child will commit suicide). So, we are supposed to withhold truth about physical reality because a child “might” commit suicide? This is akin to agreeing to a terrorist’s demands because they are threatening to murder people. Suicide cannot and should not be used as a threat, and we owe our children better care than to allow them to destroy their healthy bodies to become slaves to the medical industrial complex for the rest of their lives, especially when the onslaught of nature will never give up trying to make a person’s sex be a person’s sex because again it is unchangeable.  Follow the money regarding this specific industry and you will see who is making big money off it and promoting it. People have done so already, and the answers are not pretty, but not surprising.

Deeper Woo Woo

Finally, I am going to briefly mention some additional spiritual concerns. First, we must be careful and discerning when we start down many of these social justice movements. I am not saying it is not important to work on things like not being racist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, misogynistic, etc. What I do want to say is that many of these movements have become borderline authoritarian in their pursuit for justice and equality. Instead of bringing people together to find solutions to these problems, many of these movements seek to divide us, pit us against one another, stereotype us, and label us into monolithic groups. People are painted as oppressors or victims, and nobody shall ever leave their group. Oppressors will always oppress, and victims must always be the victim while no real healing can ever take place. They seek to say that all people in the same category are no longer individuals with their own rich histories, experiences, and ideas but rather all must be identified as belonging to a group. One false move by anyone deemed an oppressor, and they are committing an often exaggerated “act of violence” which makes everyone feel “unsafe.” So many of these movements seek to lock people in their victim states reliving their trauma over and over again, energetically living in their pain bodies in a never-ending cycle. In many ways, there is a movement to elevate the victims and denigrate the oppressors ultimately creating a role reversal (which if allowed to go on long enough) creates the exact same energies as before: victims become oppressors and oppressors become victims. Two wrongs do not make a right.  I have repeatedly heard people use terms like “white,” “male,” “cis,” and “hetero” as slurs towards people.  I have seen those people discounted and not allowed to voice an opinion or a thought in progressive circles. I am all for creating space for people who have been traditionally marginalized but not at the expense of others.  I do not feel like it is moral or ethical to cancel people for having an opinion. I do not feel like it is moral or ethical to dox people or get them fired and socially ostracized for making a mistake, or having an opinion or idea that does not jive with the group think of the masses. I do not think it is ok to ban and censor ideas, art, books, and history (and both the political left and right do this) because someone might be offended.  We are all one people, and we are all learning and growing together.  And ultimately again, I bring up past lives.  We have ALL been all the races, both sexes, and all the sexualities.  We have all been the oppressors and the victims throughout history.  It does not make sense to demonize anyone because they happen to have a certain skin color, sex, or sexual orientation while living on planet Earth.  And all people are not all the same as everyone in their assigned group.  It all comes down to love and respect.  We are all ONE humanity on this side and on the other side after we die. What we do to ourselves, we do to others.  What we do to others, we do to ourselves. 

Finally, without giving too much energy to this, there are dark forces that reside both in the physical realm and outside the physical realm who seek to pit humanity against each other and watch us destroy each other. Divide and conquer is the ultimate strategy for maintaining power and control over the masses. Their most powerful weapon is to use race, sex, and gender against us. Lastly, they are trying to disconnect us from our greatest power, both our connection to Source as spiritual beings and from our physical reality on planet earth. They seek to control nature, lie about nature, defy nature, and use it against us. They want us to be distracted and addicted to television, movies, music, video games, social media, smart phones, books, fantasy, ego, computers, science, technology, AI, thoughts, and feelings.  To free yourself from this, I say always go back to nature. She is our ultimate teacher, and she will show us what is important and where we should look to go next as humans. Ultimately know this, there is so much light, love, and truth pouring out on this planet right now. The dark forces will lose no matter how hard they try. Focus on the love and light in life and stay grounded on planet earth so you do not get dragged down in the muck with them while they get purged from the planet kicking and screaming as we move into the coming age of enlightenment.

In Peace,

Tony